Happy New Year from Systema HQ

January 03, 2013 by Systema Headquarters  
There are three stages of a man growing up:
1- He believes in Santa
2- He does not believe in Santa
3- He is Santa

It is New Year, and the judge is in a good mood, addressing the convicted:

- What are you being accused of?

- Of doing my holiday shopping too early.

- There is nothing criminal about that!

- The thing is that I was doing my shopping before the store opened...


- I read so much about the harmful effects of alcohol and smoking that I decided to quit.

- Which one drinking or smoking?

- Reading.


I am getting ready for New Year.

I think my liver is getting suspicious...

- Boxing is the best kind of sport!

- You must be a famous boxer?

- No, I am a dentist.
While I was proving to my husband that I can keep silent – I lost my voice.
The worst thing for your nervous system is a slow internet.
Would you like to radically change your life? Then simply do not pay for your internet connection.

Humor from the Russian school kids

  • Which writers do we call the classics?
  • The ones we study in class.

Teacher asking a student:

- Why are you so bad at studying English?

- Why do I need it?

- Half of the world’s population speak this language!

- Is that not enough?


- What are you going to do if hooligans attack you?

- I am not afraid of them – I know karate, aikido, judo and other scary words!


Wishing you a very Happy and Healthy New Year!

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